All About Goats and Taxes...

Tonight I feel as though a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders - if I were a more musical person, I might break out in song. No longer will I wake every morning dreading hours of thankless drudgery, no longer will I bear the frustration of trying to get it right and knowing they'll be a mess anyway. No more days spent desperately researching obscure fixes, no more hiding in the basement and wishing they'd just go away.

They're gone. Finally. Someone else's problem now. Good riddance. I just couldn't face them anymore, so tonight I packed them up in a big box and dropped them off at a nearby retirement community -

What's that? You thought I was talking about the goats? My sweet Em and Ellie? Good heavens, the headache I'm referring to is my federal tax return, due one month from tomorrow. My goatbabies?? How could you think such a thing!!

For as long as I've held a job (which is a very long time, starting with washing dishes at the now-defunct Teapot Restaurant - ironic, isn't it?), I've always filed my own tax returns, by myself, on paper. Even in the era of e-file, I stuck by my paper and pencil, looking up each deduction in that voluminous manual, painstakingly adding columns and praying that I got it right. One year I completely forgot the child tax credit (a $2000.00 error) but the IRS was kind enough to both fix my mistake and send me the difference. Each spring I meticulously researched the new tax laws, keeping files and notes and hating every minute of it. This year I started, but I need new glasses and the numbers weren't matching up, so tonight I had an appointment with a tax accountant and it is no longer my problem! Life is good! (Maybe I shouldn't celebrate until I see our refund amount - or lack of, especially since this year we do lose the child tax credit, now that my daughters are seventeen...)

If only there were a person like my tax guy for goats...I'd hand over all the problems for him to fix - yes, here's my file on feeding issues, take a deduction for the new mineral supplements, and here's all the skin problem data, and the receipts for olive oil and the aloe vera juice they're now drinking to help with the dandruff, and be sure to write off the improved fencing and make sure you look up how to deal with rainy days and frozen water bowls...

And maybe in a week or so he'd call me back and say, "Here it is, ma'am, I've resolved all your issues and answered your questions, and have a good year." Perhaps I'll suggest that to the IRS...