A Decent Proposal?

Sometimes I do things I'm later ashamed of...this is one of those days. I'm not even sure how it happened, but I sort of, well, propositioned the air-conditioning technician who came to our house today.

We all know the sordid stories about lonely housewives and repair men - but truly this behavior is not typical for me! Those who know me will attest to my high moral character, my utmost care for the integrity of my family. Just try to understand, though - my kids are always busy, my husband works late, I'm stuck here alone with these wretched goats day in and day out, my only diversion scooping up their droppings from the roof instead of the driveway, chasing them around with blue antibiotic spray to coat their ragged behinds - can you blame me for craving something more? It was a proverbial moment of weakness...Even now I cringe as I recall his pointed stare, his hesitation as he considered my proposal, his cryptic reply - "Be careful what you wish for. The answer might be yes."

Usually I dread this annual maintenance visit, as the outdoor AC unit lives in a "fence within a fence" in the goat yard, meaning that I need to relocate the goats and take down a section of wire fencing so that the technician can access the unit. When he arrived, I grabbed my boots and asked him to start with the attic ductwork while I moved the goats elsewhere. I was unprepared for his response.

"Oh, no need for that," he said cheerfully. "We have goats too, so they won't bother me at all." (Actually I hadn't been worried about them bothering him, I was more concerned that they'd put their hooves through the grates and nibble the electric wires, but now I wondered excitedly - How many years has this man been visiting our home, and I never knew this?)  The queries flooded out of me. How many? What breed? And as he told me of his farm, his horses, chickens and miniature goats, I was overwhelmed with an urge to...well, understand, here in front of me was a man in uniform who not only could fix things but also loved goats...I tried to contain my excitement but I simply could not stop. My voice was almost a whisper: "Do you...do you want to...do you want to have two more goats?"

I'm guessing from his reaction that no one has ever offered him goats on a service call.

End of story - the goats are still here, but the technician did not give me a definite "no." We both have a few months to think about it, at least until the fall when the oil furnace is due for service. If Em and Ellie want to stay, they'd better start behaving!