Standing up, Person 1 holds goat firmly against her body with goat's head on her shoulder, pinning goat's face against her shirt. (White shirts are not advised for this task - see later info. on "goat clothing.") Person 2 sneaks up behind Person 1 with the bottle, grabs the goat's mouth and forces the bottle in, using the other hand to keep goat's mouth closed. Eventually the restrained goat will begin to suck out of sheer boredom, and you may get him to take several ounces. After a week or so, the goat will have learned the futility of resistance and will drain the bottle just to get it over with. After two weeks, transition to one person being able to hold goat and bottle at the same time. By this point, the goat will be close to the age of weaning off milk, and you can stop. Unless, like us, you and the goats become so addicted to the whole process that months later you realize you are still bottle-feeding nearly full-grown goats, and when they see you coming with bottles they hurl themselves in the air and dance in circles on the driveway before running to take their places on the "feeding swing" - it may be time to seek professional help. When I find a good goat therapist, we'll start weaning.
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